When the “Why” Can’t Be Answered

A few years ago, a friend shared the heartbreaking story of 3 year-old Sarah facing the dreaded enemy—cancer. My friend talked about the courage of Sarah and the steadfast love and attention of Sarah’s mother, Adriana as they struggled to find peace. As the month’s passed, the grief of the little girl’s suffering weighed heavily on my friend. One question haunted her mother as she watched the little girl gradually lose the battle with cancer: “Why?”

That question stuck with me and I had no answer to it.

What Now?

Time passed and as I prepared for an upcoming religious conference, that question came to mind. I wanted to know the answer. I wanted know how to comfort those like my friend who grieved the suffering of a young child.

As I pondered and prayed for understanding, the strong impression came to me that instead of asking “why?” I should ask “what now?” What can I do to help relieve the suffering? Immediately I thought of my own experience in finding peace during my darkest times. Then I thought of my friend and her stories of little Sarah. Sarah knew to change the focus from why? to “what now?”

She was in and out of the hospital and befriended other children with cancer. Seeing their suffering, Sarah decided she wanted to help them. During one of her brief times at home, she asked her mother to help her set up a lemonade stand so she could earn money to buy special gifts for her new friends. And they did. Sarah’s countenance brightened as she helped those around her. She was kind and fun and always looking for the “what” that needed to be done. She blessed the lives of so many in such a short time.

Finding Peace

Sarah parted this world at the tender age of five. Only those who have lost a loved one so young could comprehend the weight of the grief they carry. Still, rather than focusing on the “why?” Sarah’s mother and her family turn their focus from why to what now? by carrying on Sarah’s quest to relieve the suffering of others. They continue to have annual lemonade stand sales, walks dedicated to Sarah’s memory, and sell t-shirts to help children with cancer. Working to carry on a loving legacy brings great comfort to Sarah’s family and countless others.

Read more about the healing in Moving from “Why?” to “What now?”

Here’s the link to an amazing organization that helps children with cancer and their families: https://www.nvchildrenscancer.org/